27 gathered pieces of advice

As I turn 27, I’m in that awkward stage before I completely lose my mind when I turn 30.  But hey, 30 is the new 20, right?  After yet another blogging hiatus, it seemed fitting to be a birthday-celebrating, comeback kid.  I’ve spent the past two weeks jotting down what I would consider important things I’ve come to realize in my 27 years on earth.

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  1.  Not everyone is your friend.
    There is a fine line between a true friend and an acquaintance.  Growing up, my dad used to tell me if you had two or three people you could always count on, you were lucky.  The older I get, the more this comes to light.
  2. Mom is always right.
    My mom knows me better than I know me.  It’s safe to say she has accurately predicted 99.9% of the outcomes of major events in my life.  I also know this to be true if we disagree.  I would like to think this is the case with all moms, but my mom really is a saint.
  3. The world does not owe you a thing, but you owe the world everything.
    I constantly hear older individuals moan and groan about millennials being ‘entitled’ and ‘privileged.’  This is actually true of many people I’ve come across, not just millennials.  But the cold hard truth is that you have to earn and fight for everything in life.  And while not a single person is more important than the next, we each owe every thing to the world we live in and essentially create for ourselves.
  4. Your gut doesn’t lie.
    You know that earth-shattering, butterfly-floating, nauseous feeling you develop in certain scenarios?  Well, that’s your gut.  Mine hasn’t failed me yet.
  5. If someone acts like they don’t care, I promise you, they don’t.
    If someone truly cares about you and the relationship you have, they will make it clear with their actions, friendly or romantic.  The converse is also true, and it is as simple as that.
  6. Be present.
    I desperately need to work on this; but life is best enjoyed when you put down your phone, truly live in the moment, and take in all the sensory cues around you.  These are the moments worth living for.  Put your anxiety aside and live.
  7. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
    Small annoyances can ruin your day if you let them, so, don’t.
  8. Life doesn’t go as planned.
    I used to physically drive myself insane when the surprise I had planned for months or the to-do list I made for the day didn’t follow through second by second.  But I’ve realized, that’s life, and sometimes your plans turn out more amazing than you ever could have dreamed up yourself.
  9. Self-love is key.
    Simply put, you cannot love someone else until you love yourself first.
  10. You cannot put your full self in someone else and remain happy.
    Going along with number 9, it is perfectly acceptable to make someone the top of your priority list, that is with reason.  When you start losing yourself in that person and your relationship, that’s where the problem lies.  Every relationship requires some type of healthy balance.
  11. Music heals.
    With every situation and emotion I’ve endured, I cannot imagine doing so without music.  In fact, if I could have a soundtrack playing in the background of my day to day, you sure bet I would.
  12. Never go to bed mad.
    My mom used to tell me this growing up, and I never fully appreciated it until recently.  Day to day, none of us know what is going to happen.  I think it’s so super important to let people you care about know it, at any opportunity you may have.
  13. Always be open to new things, especially the ones that scare you.
    Enough said.  These are the moments in life that give you the best chance to grow.  
  14. People don’t change, but they do evolve.
    This one has become clearer to me in more recent years.  Although people can become more of who they are as they ‘figure themselves out,’ people don’t actually change. They just become more of who they’re destined to be.
  15. Emotions are a sign of strength.
    Individuals who allow themselves to feel, especially in the eyes of others, are the dopest, strongest people in my opinion.  It takes a large amount of a person to be vulnerable.  I have never understood why suppressing emotion is generally viewed as the accepted norm in our society.  I’m not saying it’s reasonable to be a basket case every day of your life, but shedding a few tears when something is overwhelmingly joyful or depressing, or wanting to scream someone’s name from the rooftops when you’re completely head over heels in love with them – now that’s pretty badass.
  16. Hope and faith will always carry you through.
    I’m a sucker for love, but all too often, hope and faith get pushed by the wayside.  When all seems lost, and you just really want to freaking give up, hope is what carries us all through.  And faith.  How could we make any major decision or believe in ANYTHING without faith?  I love, love.  But I’d say hope and faith have always been on my side.
  17. Things happen for a reason.
    This sounds so completely cliché, but when I look at my life, if I wouldn’t have made certain choices, I wouldn’t have met individuals of whom I’m so incredibly close with, or I wouldn’t be a nurse.  Certain moments in life can definitely suck, but they also can put you exactly where you need to be.
  18. Balance.
    I’ve heard the saying ‘too much of anything is bad.’  While this is true, complete restriction of other things is equally as dangerous.  Life is all about give and take, as well as moderation.
  19. Life is rarely black and white, but full of grey areas.
    No decision is ever cut and dry, and nothing is ever as it appears from an outsider’s perspective.  Not a single person’s life is perfect.  All of life’s relationships, moments, decisions, and situations are somewhat messy.
  20. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
    Whether it be in a relationship, the workplace, or just getting through a difficult situation, don’t be afraid to ask for help.  My dad used to always tell me growing up, ‘you’ll never know until you ask.’  When I first started my job where I work now, I asked five million questions every single day.  I still ask questions.  By getting perspective from more senior, more experienced nurses, it made me become a better nurse.  The same goes for life in general.  I would hate to learn in hindsight that someone close to me was struggling and never asked me for help or advice.  None of us have all the answers, so we might as well navigate and struggle through life together.
  21. Be curious.  
    As hard as we may try, we will never fully understand one another, specifically in terms of why a person makes certain decisions or acts the way they do.  It can be defeating and just plain hurt at times.  I’ve learned the best way to handle this is to question why?  What happened to that person in their past that makes them behave the way they do?  It makes things a lot easier to understand why someone can hurt you in certain situations, especially when it may not even have anything to do with you personally.
  22. Things always seem worse at night.
    Generally speaking, it’s easy to get caught up in your own thoughts when world is dark and quiet.  At 2 am, your world can feel like it’s falling apart.  While you are only your own worst enemy at this time, I say sleep on it and start over in the morning.
  23. Mistakes are opportunities.
    Every single mistake you make in life, you should learn from.  But if you’ve learned something and grew in the process, is it really a mistake?  Essentially all of these lessons culminate who you are as an individual.
  24. Buy those shoes, eat that donut, catch that flight.  
    Yes. Yes. Yes.  I’m not saying to foolishly drop excessive sums of money when funds are limited or to polish off the entire box of donuts.  What I am saying, is you’re human, you do the best you can, and sometimes you have to treat yourself.
  25. Every situation is temporary.
    It is so easy to get down on yourself, while being caught up in a certain bad situation or feeling.  Before you let your mood spiral out of control, you have to remind yourself everything is temporary; every disappointment, every high, every low, every moment of bliss.  Wide ranges of emotion and experiences are all part of life.
  26. Timing is everything.
    Regardless of how much we may want to fight it, timing is everything.  Whether it’s a job, a relationship, a financial investment, sometimes the stars just don’t align.  It may seem like missed opportunity, but in reality it’s the cruel nature that is the fate of our lives.  Don’t resist it, if it’s meant to happen, it will.
  27. Time flies.
    I swear, the older you become, the faster time passes.  Sometimes, I feel like I turned 21 just last year!Anddddd with all of these things in mind, may 27 be the best year yet <3xoxo,

    Jess

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